YO don't snooze....check it!
ima huff and puff/and blow da cypha down/nigga wish yo,they neva heard my sound/like hypocrities/ain't no stoppin me/as im droppin these /lyrical mockeries/on these bitches/rhymes hittin da mind/so hard im causin stitches/and u wishin/u neva fucked wit da ice/ill hit u twice/coldhearted cuz i started/a battle to win/and ill continue to flow sin/again and again/im makin u dizzy/cuz u know i get busy/on da mic/flows foolin u/and im sayin SIKE!/oh my/u didn't catch that/cuz ill bust a rap/that'll have ya slippin and slidin/fallin and crawlin/while i'll be climbin and shinin/standin talla than ballas/don't hate on this female/whos lyrical scale/can't even be measured/im like peer pressure/ill get ya hooked on some shit/yall can't eva fuck wit/like a drug u can't kick/then ill cause a split/ to yo brain/then you'll really feel my pain/just like a migraine/shit/ my lyrical division/will cause an incision/in ya throat/make ya choke/the one and only I-C-E has just spoke/u know da one who put da poison in yo toke/got ya madd high/left ya almost dead/ then broke... YO, Just had to let out a lil anger....PEACE AND 1NE YALL.....ilYN A.k.A I-C-E
This was alright, saw some bright spots, some multi-syllable rhyming, etc. My advice is to read other posts to see different styles and to see how to expand on yours. A lot of your lines were aight, but not saying anything new, feel me. Think you should try to put more creativity into some lines.
I'm a man hun, sorry...didnt mean to dissapoint ya if i did...but dont worry, i get that female riff ALL THE TIME...lmao
yo, that was my bad on spelling, i meant to say Hypocrates, yo and thanx for da check on Inspectah, good lookin.....1NE
"like hypocrities/ain't no stoppin me"
- whatz this mean...If you point out someone's a hypocrite..haven't you stopped them already
"/as im droppin these /lyrical mockeries"
- be careful of spittin already used materials, u may not have known but Inspectah Deck in Triumph (first verse)..said
I bomb atomically/ Socrates philosophies and hypothoses can't define how I be droppin these/ Mockeries...lyrically performed armed robbery/ flee with tha lottery, possible they spotted me...and so on...
- its a phat line though if ya didn't know
The verse got better as it progressed...Mos definately got the illmatics to perform. keep it up
- tha UnJust aka ChinAquA